Just Kidding

How is it that people get away with saying things like, "not to be negative, but..." or "no offense but..." or "I don't want to come off as insensitive but..." as if prefacing you're negativity with such a statement excuses you of the offense you are about to commit?

"Don't take this the wrong way but, you're totally pathetic and no one will ever love you."

The other one, that's slightly less venomous but not by much is the, "just kidding," when you obviously wouldn't have said whatever preceded it if you actually were kidding. For example,

"dude these chairs are pieces of shit, I tried standing on it to change this light bulb and the thing just disintegrated underneath me, I almost killed myself."

"yeah well, maybe if you weren't such a fat ass. Ha ha, just kidding. They do suck."

YOUR NOT FUCKING KIDDING! You can't say something really insulting and simply tack on a just kidding as if that some how makes it no longer offensive.

So next time you catch yourself about to say, "not to..." or "I don't wanna..."

just... don't then. Because you are. And you know it.